November 6 – Day 50

Droznine is the foremost Movement instructor/methodologist in all of Russia. He almost single handedly recreated the way movement was done on the post-revolution stage. (The main reason for this was that Stalin had almost all innovators of movement technique executed during his reign because of any threat they might pose to the Social Realist ideal. Theatre after that was limited primarily to talking.) Natasha is a scholar of Droznine and because she was away this week, she asked him to speak with us. He is such a captivating presence although not at all what I expected. He looks more like Pee-Wee Herman than the Adonis I expected to be responsible for why I am being bent into strange and terrible positions on a daily basis. He had so many insightful theories on humanity and the human form but more so on the spiritual relationship we have with our being. He talked about the pragmatism of his American students and I guess I had never thought of it but it is so very true. In American society we think of our bodies more like something that we own than an essential part of the body, mind, soul triphecta. We eat to get nourishment, to get it done and get on with it. We run because we feel that we need to maintain a certain form or look at our shape from the periphery, as an object to be controlled for public perception or utilization. What I found so intriguing was that he discussed the idea of ritual as a way to maintain daily awareness of your being and as a way to become more present in your world. Being present is something I struggle with and even here, surrounded by these great thinkers with so much knowledge to share, it is hard not to stray to thoughts about what in the hell I am going to do next. The irony didn’t phase me tonight when I read the trades for the first time since I left Los Angeles. I had no idea what was going in the business and really didn’t care but suddenly the writers are on strike and life it seems as well as the business has moved forward in my absence. There was a split second when I thought that maybe this was a make or break situation, like somehow my reaction to this information would be an indication of where I should go next but I am fairly sure life is not that easy. So I panicked for about a second, and then became engrossed, reveling in the idea of thinking for a minute about the actual business - not theories of art but the reality of how to get it done. It was exciting feeling connected again for a second but I quickly realized that there is absolutely no one here I can share this with and no one I can really talk to about it at home, or in LA I should say. Regardless the day was full of insight and exciting new things to ponder about the world although it seems grand revelations about the future will have to wait for another day. For now I just have to deal with the task of being present.